i don't need to see your nipples to know you are pretty

So I quit buying Vogue because there was just way too much gratuitous nipplage. I'm a mother. I don't want to look at all the deathly skinny models perky tweeny boobs. I want to be inspired, not depressed because I have nursed a child and he sucked all the perk right out of me.

I plan on bringing that up one of these days when he says "You never let me do anything!" I'll say, "Oh yes I do. I let you turn my tight body into a blob of warm dough with stretch marks. That's how much I love you." I'm thinking fifteen might be the right age to use that bullet. In front of his friends for effect.

Where was I? Oh, boobs.

Anyway, I'm sick of them and I decided to do something about it. I subscribed to Eliza. Here's the little blurb the Editor gives about the magazine:

ELIZA Magazine is created for women who want to be stylish, sexy, and engaged in the world while retaining high standards in dress, entertainment, and lifestyle. In a media culture that frequently objectifies and commercializes women and their bodies, ELIZA strives to provide an alternative to the current mainstream media that emphasizes sex and skin in order to push products or sell magazines.

So, basically it's for moms like me that have a whole lot of somethin', somethin' to cover up.

Here's a peek at some of my favorite fashions from Eliza.

Have absolutely no where to wear this cape to but I soooo wish I did. Now the hat, I could find somewhere to wear that for sure.

Wishing I could rock coral lipstick. Not happening.

Must acquire this headband today, or tomorrow at the latest.

This dress I love sooo much I contacted the vintage clothing store that was credited in the magazine to see if it was still available. No go.

However, if I ever have an occasion to wear such a dress, I know several wonderful seamstresses who I can call on to recreate it for me.

It's in my style books (more on those later).

I think I'd skip the hat and opt for this veil. Would it be weird if I wore something like this to the grocery store? I lourvvvve it that much.

Okay, enough day dreaming. Time to break out the Oxy Clean and try to salvage what's left of Amelie's cute outfit after this morning's blow out.

I'm so glamorous.