blue

Sugar Daddy has been gone and I find that I am becoming quite blue. The house is full of little bodies but it's oh so empty.  I have things to do every second of the day and yet I am bored. 

The hour I set aside to work in the studio while the babies slept was entirely unproductive.  Instead of working on a large order I have due next week, I spun slowing in my chair with my camera to my eye.  I focused here and there. I zoomed in on Finnigan's nose.

I thought about my husband, hard at work in some court room in the big bad city of Los Angeles.  I tried to picture what tie he might be wearing and I thought about how his hair brushes the tops of his ears. Salt and pepper sexy.

I listened to a little Johnny Cash. I pinched the fat on my stomache and assesed how long it will take me to run it off.  I picked some red paint off my desk. And then the Little Mister started grunting, and like clock work the Bird called out to me and that was it. My time was over.

I'm feeling blue because life is a lot of hard work these days.

And if I have to be in the trenches, then I want Sugar Daddy with me.

He's got my back.

The studio through my lens today:

these boobs were made for cuddling. . .

And that's just what they'll do. One of these days these boobs are going down a size or two.

I haven't worked out for almost three weeks. Three weeks people! I've been slowly gaining weight over the last year or so and now I find that I am a solid fifteen pounds over weight.

It always goes to my boobs first, then my belly and arms and thighs. Ug.

I actually allowed myself to think (get this) that it is okay to have a few extra pounds on when you first get a baby. It's nature's way of making a soft cuddly place for the baby to rest.

It's a great theory and it works well, IF YOU ARE PREGNANT.

I've got four weeks to lose some weight and I'm getting serious. Really. This time I'm serious.

As of last night I am down 0 pounds and up one peppermint Oreo. Let's see what today brings.