Sometimes I make something or draw something and I stand back and think- that looks like complete amateur crap.
Now that I think about it, I do this quite often.
But every now and again, I stand back and think- damn you're good.
I used to get bogged down by all the ugliness I produced. Depressed really. And frustrated.
But I had a life changing moment some years ago.
I took a weekend art course from Anahata Katkin. When the class ended we were just hanging out and I was basking in her glow. She's so radiant, I swear the girl actually glows. Anyway, we were just shooting the bull and she was talking about how she paints all the time. And I asked her what she did with all her paintings and she said that most of them where just in stacks in her studio. I just couldn't believe this because surely she could sell them no problem. Why let them just sit there?
And then she told me something I'll never forget. She said that for her, painting is like taking photographs. You don't show up at a shoot expecting to take just one photo. You take a whole bunch and pick the best one. She said she paints a whole bunch of pictures she doesn't like until she paints one she does.
This was big for me. This made all my creative mistakes and bad decisions okay. It made them part of the process.
My good friend Rhonna Farrer has made "Enjoy the Process" her personal mantra. Enjoy all the ugly messes I make? Okay. I will give it a go.
I find that I am much more productive when I don't start each project as if it is my last.
I have found creative freedom in all my mess.
FYI- the photo at the top of the post was the best of ten.
Buying the vintage aqua squirrel vase was a decision I made right the first time.